Wednesday, March 25, 2009
The bull of doom
Back in the old days, when I worked at the bank, I got the job of getting the float built. The float? you say. Every year there is a big to-do in my town. It involves parades and rodeos and carnivals and dances and concerts. Anyway, the bank had a float every year and for many years they had just hired someone to build it. But lo and behold, she tired of float-building, having done it for many years and not just for the bank. So we decided to do it ourselves. Did you know there are float-building catalogs out there? Indeed. I was chosen to design it and get it built so I promptly got myself a committee and we brainstormed and came up with a design. A rodeo bull with a tiny fence around it. I forget what the theme was that year. One of the loan officers was handy with tools so I was design and he was engineering. I decided what I wanted where and he figured out how to do that. The float was doing well (buying drinks for people that volunteered to help didn't hurt) and one evening I had to work late but was planning to go over to where the float was being built. Being the earth-conscious person I am, I decided to walk there. The bull had been finished and was being brought to put on the float. Did I say that the float was being built in an empty potato warehouse? The float was being built in an empty potato warehouse kind of on the backside of the building of where the company was active. So after work I walk to the warehouse to check out the work of my committee. Since I wasn't there to direct things, I guess the motivation fell apart and everyone had left. But since I was there, I decided to take a look at the bull. Lifting the wooden bar to open the huge door, I saw the bull in his glory. Unfortunately he was pointed the wrong direction on the float so I walked in to examine him from all sides. It looked great. I had been hesitant about the woman who volunteered to make him, not knowing if he would come out looking any good or not. But he was great. I was impressed. I stood there in admiration when suddenly a gust of wind came up and slammed the door to the warehouse shut. If there were lights in the building, I didn't know where they were. Fortunately it wasn't completely dark but I imagined all the creepy crawlies coming out of the woodwork to feed upon me now that I was trapped in there. The bull also didn't look so great any more. Kind of a malign presence looming above me. As I walked to the door I also realized that I was kind of in an out of the way place and no one really knew I was there. There was no car to indicate anyone had been there. I imagined that I just disappeared off the face of the earth and no one would find me for 24 hours at least. The distance to the door got longer and longer. Would it open? Would the slamming shut have made the wooden bar fall latching me in forever? Were there spiders on the door I was about to touch? I walked toward it, pushed, and it opened! Crisis averted! As I walked home I was so glad I didn't have to spend the night in a dirty creepy crawly warehouse in the dark. Then about 5 blocks from home it started to pour rain. So I got soaked. The bull had his revenge.