The eyes have it.

I didn't really tell you the whole story of the eye thing. First we went in, they did all the little lens flicking on that monstrosity they use to check your vision. the letters were all on a screen on a computer that was reflected in a big mirror. The last time I went to the eye doctor, people didn't have computers much. All these new fangled gadgets these days. (getting old alert) Then we were told we needed glasses. So then we picked out frames. Mine look spectacular thankyouverymuch. Then the drops. Some drops to numb your eyes and those burned a little. Then the drops to dilate. Those were the trouble. They work. Wide eyed little kitten I was. Too bad I couldn't see anything. Then they put you in a dark room and shine a bright light in your eyes. (I know, I know, they do it to everyone but it's all new to me) Then they bring you out and make you sign your life away when you can't even read anything. Then out into the cold cruel world. Well, actually it was nice out. But so bright! So I took my son to Mcdonalds (food mecca) and I couldn't tell if they gave me the right salad because I couldn't see it. Then I go to throw all the trash off my tray and as I tip it, I hear a clink. Holy crap, my keys. I say "oops" and hear some giggles off to my right but I can't tell if it's young girls or old men giggling at me. What is there to do but start digging. Fortunately they had just changed the trash and so I was only digging through my trash. Finally found the keys and beat a hasty retreat. It took a long time for my eyes to get back to normal. The next day felt like my eyes had a hangover.